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Showing posts from 2015

Dogs In Sweaters and the Infertility Highway

I almost took a nosedive out of my office chair, so surprised by the sun was I. After days of deluge and dark skies, the sun is peeking at me with an impish grin from behind my office curtains and without realizing it, my heart feels tickled by the warmth of it. It reminds me to have hope. Today started off with a visit to my doctor. One of my many doctors. You see, for the past two years Dustin and I have been travelling down Infertility Highway, and every mile along the way has a mandatory road side stop, each one representing one more invasive test, one more blood draw, one more change to diet or medication or opinion. I'm not complaining, I'm thankful for my doctors, I'm thankful that they have hope...., because there are days that I'm so tired of fighting for this, it's good to have someone to have hope for me. But "this" represents a baby. Ours. Isn't that worth fighting for? Yes. Yes it is. Things have been getting better for me

The Uglies

Here's a funny story, I recently took a mental hike and stepped in something pretty stinky. When I looked down to see what that something stinky might be, I found myself ankle deep in a........ Steaming Pile of the Uglies. My own, in fact. I think I must have suffered an implosion of sorts, and everything that was "in" decided to come "out". Out came the angry witch lady who yells at her dog for being alive. Out came the petulant toddler screaming at her husband....., who dared to say words. Out came the lazy sloth....., who decided that living in a pig sty could actually be cozy. Out came the sullen teenager, who decided that silence is the best sort of communication. Out came the despairing and wilted lily, who decided that life was Just-So-Totally-Over. Oh boy did it steam and did it stink. I must have been saving it all up for months. It's funny how emotions can build up like that. Like a giant 2 liter bottle of soda shaken up and re